You don’t have “it”? It being happiness, confidence, the love of being out with friends and anything else. Pretend you do, pretend you are. This isn’t an attempt to hoodwink your peers or desired friends or other, faking it until you make it isn’t meant to be a sub par performer tricking others into thinking they’re great. The trick is played on yourself. I believe that people are mostly equal. Your brain is no different to the bright kid in school that was revered. I lived my life for many years learning nothing. Before that time I believed I was smart, not overly dedicated but definitely smart. As the years went by with my achievements still limited to those boosting my gamerscore I began to feel stupid, more and more stupid.
Which I was, most definitely. I wasn’t in a good place back then but of course we all know people who even through rough times continue to learn and to grow, some even thrive on these bad times and gain motivation to improve and win even more. So what do you do when time has already passed? You can’t go back in time with a new determination to make sure you continue to show results and continue to improve yourself. However, lack of growth doesn’t mean you’re not smart. You can learn anything, if you could go back in time and had the determination to do so, I believe 100% you could work yourself to whatever career you wish regardless of what you feel of yourself right now.
This is because our brains are all mostly the same. I recall reading about a child prodigy who was asked why he was able to understand the complicated things he could understand beyond his years. His answer was that his brain implemented less ‘blocks’ when trying to learn something or work something out. Simple as that. His brain was not larger, denser nor filled with magical intelligence power. His brain works better because when he encounters a problem it simply doesn’t fog up as much as ours.
This is where faking it until you make it comes in. So many times in our lives we get that elusive motivation to do something, something bigger than we’re used to. It seems so simple at the beginning, step one, step two, step three and we’re nearly there. You sleep on it. Problems arise, “it’s not natural to me”, “can I fix the problem that would come with doing this” ‘roadblock 3’, ‘roadblock 4’ – you get the idea. Do it. Just do it. Tell yourself you are the person who would do this. So what if you’re not, you can be and the way to make sure that you will be is to do the thing as if you were someone who would do that.
You can’t study 5 hours straight like the top achievers in your class? Act as if you are one of the top achievers and study as long as you can. You can’t lead people? Act as if you were a leader and go with it. You can’t make a lot of friends and go out every day? Act as if you are one of those people you look up to who do that (although you don’t actually have to go out all that much to make friends of course). If backing off because “I wouldn’t be able to do it anyway” gives you a 0% chance of success, why not wing it and see? Author Dorothea Brande wrote a book on the subject called “Wake up and live!” where she explains that to get the best chance of success in any venture you should act as if you have already achieved what you are looking to do and now you’re just doing what you did to achieve it.
What does this achieve? It gives you the confidence to do what you can do. You can do it. Unless your goal is to operate on somebody’s brain without medical knowledge or similarly long-term skilled professions, you can do it just as anyone else can. Thinking this way relieves stress also, which negatively impacts results of any venture. If you saw into the future and saw that you had successfully completed the project you are stressing over, you’d feel a lot more relaxed about doing it right now surely? So fake it until you make it and be happy doing it.